Children of the Corn

 

Title: Children of the Corn

Year: 1984

Director: Fritz Kiersch

Summary: Burt and his girlfriend Vicky stumble upon a small town in Nebraska that is completely void of adults. After looking in several buildings in search of a phone, they realize that the town has been taken over by extremely religious children. The children believe that no one should live above the age of 18. A game of cat and mouse ensues between the children and the couple.

Dave’s Rant: Well this movie just proves why it is better to be an atheist. The overzealous kids follow a psycho (named Isaac) who leads them on a massacre of their own parents and every adult in town. The FBI estimates that there are approximately 50 serial killers in the United States at a time; I guess they are all under the age of 18 in the middle of bumfuck nowhere. It’s hard to sympathize with any of the protagonists. Burt is obnoxious and has over the top commitment issues while Vicky is next to useless. The best character in terms of acting is Isaac (John Franklin). He is extremely creepy and reminds me an awful lot of another bastard everyone hates….:

 

Seriously. They both are little bitches who we just want to see die. This movie has some moments that could make you jump and a somewhat decent plot. But it’s slow and the CGI is unbearably horrible. I know, I know, this movie was from the 80s. But it is horrendous. The ending was also the most awkward thing I have ever seen. Read the book, skip the movie.

Memorable Quote: “But he’s always been here, just like He Who Walks Behind the Rows.”

Rating: 4/10